“A Broken Man”

I have loved without loving.

I have sought without seeking.

I have played without playing.

I have slept without sleeping.

Thinking of her brings a bit of confusion to my world.

As a wrecking ball; unleashed amidst abandoned structures.

Is there order in this chaotic and fleeting emotion called passion?

Yet she is with another man. My heart breaks. My ego fractures.

I have stood without standing.

I have craved without craving.

I have demanded without demanding.

I have saved without saving.

She touches me with ordinary words I have heard many times before.

Her smile makes the sun shine a little brighter.

The way she tilts her head makes me yearn for her kiss.

How good it would be to pull an all-nighter.

I have lived without living.

I have lied without lying.

I have said without saying.

I have cried without crying.

There are no tears this day although I am alone.

It was spent reading, writing, and playing with my son.

I have changed my outlook on life.

A new beginning awaits me; I may be alone, but I'm not done.

I have written without writing.

I have sung without singing.

I have fled without fleeing.

I have bled without bleeding.

Communication is impersonal though technology has simplified the process.

We text and e-mail but never take pen to paper anymore.

We seldom make an effort towards being courteous.

A hand-written note can reach a heart's core.

I have heard without hearing.

I have seen without seeing.

I have known without knowing.

I have been without being.

My heart cries out for love but receives no response.

My arms yearn to hold you but you’re too far away.

My eyes long to behold the world, but cannot see beyond your horizon.

My mind dreams but they quickly fade at the break of day.

I hear but am not being heard.

I see but am not being seen.

I find but have not been found.

I need but am not being needed.

My desire to love; is it all for naught?

Darkness has tried to keep me from the Light of Creation.

Her love and affection was all I sought.

She is the source of much of my elation.

I have lain without laying.

I have risen without rising.

I have touched without touching.

I have laughed without laughing.

Selfishness has tried to make me an unreasonable man in need.

Stubbornness wanted to leave a loving heart to love itself.

Aloofness has kept me from my lover and caused a lonely heart to bleed.

Foolishness attempted to make me give to those who do not give.

I have made my declaration but will not patiently await her acquiescence.

She dominates my thoughts, as I lay supine upon my bed.

Hearing her name conjures up images of love, joy, and happiness.

Yet, life is to lived. There are fantasies to be explored; exploits to be exploited; and carnal desires to be fulfilled.